31 Days of Horror: Mindhunter (Ep1)

Cops like me because they can talk to me more than they can talk to their own wives, some of them.

Edmund Kemper

31 days, we finally made it.  For my final review, I was going to write about John Carpenter’s Halloween.  Nearly everyone doing this sort of thing will be writing about it today, and while it is one of my favorite films, I’m not sure that I can offer much of an unique perspective on one of the most discussed horror films of all time.  Suffice to say, it deserves all of the praise and is the best work from a man with a career full of movies that others wished were their best.

Mindhunter is the latest Netflix hit from David Fincher, who kickstarted the streaming giant into the original TV business with House of Cards.  For someone who famously loves to control his projects, it’s not surprising that Fincher chose to work with an organization that reportedly gives its creators plenty of creative freedom.

It’s no surprise that Mindhunter and Fincher go so well together.  Fincher already tackled one of the most famous serial killers in Zodiac, a movie that many consider one of the best of the 21st century.  I would argue that the scene on Lake Berryessa is possibly the scariest thing on film to date.  How the scene, which Fincher apparently asked the survivor of the attack to help describe, unfolds and where it goes is absolutely chilling.  It’s the type of horror that’s terrifying because it sadly happened and because you know there’s nothing that can be done to stop that sort of thing.

Mindhunter doesn’t have anything like that (at least in the first episode I watched).  It focuses on the cerebral, on the why instead of the what.  Holden Ford (Jonathan Groff) is an FBI instructor at Quantico who wants to learn more about why people commit the acts they do.  The explanation of ‘they’re just crazy’, something that seemed like a pretty easy answer, isn’t enough for him.  Ford wants to know why people are doing this sort of thing because he thinks its the only way to stop it.

Mindhunter is based on a true story.  It’s a slow burn and not something that will have a shoot out or body an episode, but if you’re into crime stories, it’s worth watching.  Nobody else shoots the type of scenes Fincher does, and for him to have four hours to direct is something he’d never get in a movie.

7.5 out of 10

31 Days of Horror: The Cabin in the Woods

Okay, I’m drawing a line in the fucking sand, here. Do not read the Latin.

Marty 

The meta-horror movie is something that has been done many times.  It’s been done well, in cases like Scream, and it’s been done poorly (my hot take is I despise Tucker and Dale vs Evil).  A meta-horror movie has to be self-aware, but there’s a certain tone it has to balance or it might go too far one way or the other.  We’re fine with movies that are funny or ones that are scary, but people can’t stand a film that doesn’t know what it wants to be.

Cabin in the Woods does not have that problem.  Written by Drew Goddard (Alias, Cloverfield, World War Z)  and Joss Whedon (Buffy, The Avengers), the movie was highly anticipated by many who loved the genre.  Both of the writers know the genre well enough to put hundreds of little easter eggs throughout the film.  There’s the famous betting board scene, which includes odds for all sorts of horror monsters; zombies, clowns, redneck torture family, angry molesting tree, they’re all on the list.  Goddard and Whedon have forgotten more movies than most of us have seen.

It’s why the film is casted so well.  Curt (Chris Hemsworth before Thor) is the perfect jock.  Dana (Kristen Connolly) is the shy cute “virgin”, or close enough as some characters would say.  My personal favorite is Fran Kranz, who steals the show as the stoner.  For as well as he did in this movie, I’m surprised he hasn’t gone on to have a much larger career.

You can’t forget about Sitterson (Richard Jenkins) and Hadley (Bradley Whitford), who play the guys running the whole operation.  It’s hilarious to see some sort of government organization betting on the order of sacrifices of teenagers and their anger when a Japanese monster fails to kill an elementary school class.  When Hadley finally gets his merman, we can’t help but laughing as the creature blows blood out of its hole (and Joss Whedon gets to kill Amy Acker one more time).

Cabin in the Wood is one of the best meta-horror movies of the 21st century (my other nominee would be Shaun of the Dead).  It’s an essential film for all horror fans, and I think even enjoyable for those who don’t love the genre.

8.5 out of 10

 

31 Days of Horror: The Descent (2005)

I’m an English teacher, not fucking Tomb Raider.

Beth

SPOILERS THROUGHOUT THE REVIEW FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN’T SEEN THE FILM.  IF YOU HAVEN’T, GO DO IT RIGHT NOW!!!

The Descent is one of my favorite horror movies.  I remember the first time I saw it, alone in my London flat, shades drawn on a sunny day and underneath the covers so it felt dark like a horror movie should.  I remember pausing the film once or twice, the intensity so high that I felt like I needed a minute.  Neil Marshall, writer and director of The Descent, puts pedal to the metal and pushes the movie forward at an impossible pace.  To quote the great Roger Ebert, who gave The Descent four stars, “It (The Descent) takes the plunge — damn the character development, full speed into the void.”

At a superficial level, The Descent can be a story of a group of strong women trapped alone with monsters in a cave.  If you take the film at just that, it’s still great, but this movie is truly about a woman, Sarah (Shauna McDonald), who has already lost her husband and daughter, and loses everyone and everything she has, including her mind  (hence the title of the film).

I’ve seen The Descent enough times that I decided to watch it with the commentary.  The track includes Neil Marshall and nearly every star of the film, minus Juno (Natalie Mendoza).  The cast seems to get along well and the commentary has plenty of jokes that contrast what is going on onscreen.

Marshall repeatedly mentions Deliverance, another survivalist classic, as an inspiration for the film.  Juno is dressed like a “sexier Burt Reynolds” and there is a banjo intentionally laid out in the cabin at the first part of the film.  Marshall also states that the scene of the women first discovering the boneyard is a nod to John Hurt finding Space Jockey in Alien.  While Neil Marshall has never had a bonafide Hollywood film breakout (Marshall is directing the Hellboy reboot), he is responsible for both Game of Thrones’ Blackwater (the penultimate episode of the 2nd season) and Watchers on the Wall (the penultimate episode of the 4th season).  These two episodes include some of the most cinematic scenes ever shot for a television show and are among fan favorites.

Sarah’s slide into madness begins when she find her friend Beth (Alex Reid), half-fed on by the crawlers and bleeding out in a cave.  It’s here where Sarah realizes that Juno is responsible for Beth’s inevitable death, and Sarah gathers the strength to put her dying friend out of her misery.  The scene then moves on to Sarah killing a child crawler, then its mother, and finally the father.  By the end of the action, Sarah is covered in blood and unleashes a scream that could easily be confused for a crawler.

Sarah and Juno have one last battle together against the crawlers.  During the fight, which was apparently shot in only two days due to production constraints, Sarah is silent and lethal, while Juno is human, screaming and yelling with each blow she gives.  A particular highlight of the scene is Sarah eye-gouging one of the creatures to death with little to no emotion.

For anyone who has watched the film, I do hope it was the original UK cut.  Where the UK cut sends us back to Sarah in the caves, completely mad and finally reunited with her dead daughter, the US version ends with Sarah escaping.  This all leads to a fairly subpar sequel that is less than essential for even fans of the film.

The Descent is a brilliant piece of filmmaking.  It is not only one of my favorite horror movies, but one that I ranked on my “best of the 21st century” list I created with a friend.

10 out of 10

 

31 Days of Horror: Stranger Things Season 2 (Ep 1-3)

Last summer, Stranger Things became an internet sensation.  I was excited for the show from the get-go, as a Stephen King and Carpenter fan, it seemed like a King-like world filled with synth music and monsters.  What more could I ask for?

Stranger Things appealed to horror fans like me and the common man.  People like my girlfriend, who hate horror movies and everything to do with them, were suddenly watching the events unfold in Hawkins with interest.  It helped that everyone could watch all the episodes in one day on Netflix and word spread fast.  Soon Stranger Things was seen by everyone and their mother and garnering Emmy nominations.

Many were afraid that Stranger Things would fall into a sophomore slump.  After watching almost three episodes, I can tell you that is not the case.  Stranger Things throws us right back into Hawkins almost a year after the incidents of the first season.  Will, missing for most of last season, is living an awkward life with an overprotective mother who is afraid he can be brought back to the upside down at any second. The rest of his friends are doing their best to accommodate Will, but Mike still misses Eleven and calls for her every night on the radio.

There’s a notable step up in the visual effects this year.  Stranger Things also has a soundtrack that definitely cost a few more dollars to assemble some known hits we all remember.  It’s only ten or so minutes into the first episode where you realize the show you love is still there, that the characters are still the same, but we can just have some improvement in budget for a show that was such a massive success.

I’m the target audience for Stanger Things, so I may be biased, but if you enjoyed the previous season, you’ll feel at home here as well.

9 out of 10 (Eps 1-3)

I’ll be doing a full review and deep dive of the season later this week, but I wanted to start out with what I’ve seen so far.

31 Days of Horror: Geostorm

Today we tackle a different form of horror: Nature.  Horror has many villains.  There are masked-men with machetes, beasts that feast on human flesh, viruses that turn people into enraged animals that would tear apart their own family if they weren’t subdued, but these all have some sort of weakness.  You can hopefully kill the masked man with a gun (unless the movie has a Roman numeral).  You can figure out a way to last until sunlight and let the human flesh feasting creatures die when natural light hits them.  You can impale the crazed people with a sword and stop their infected brains.

There is no stopping a tsunami.  There is no stopping a cone of winds that top out over one hundred miles an hour and move at a pace you could never outrun.  A volcano that explodes and shoots flaming magma and ash that will choke you if you are within miles is an unavoidable death sentence.  Nature has many horrific events that cannot be predicted and can kill thousands in seconds.  Just think of the supervolcano underneath Yellowstone, which reportedly could kill millions and cripple America forever.

Nature’s power has always fascinated me.  I’ve enjoyed every Roland Emmerich disaster movie, from Day After Tomorrow to 2012, so when I heard his producing partner Dean Devlin was working on a film called Geostorm, I was thrilled.  There was a giant wave in the first trailer, followed by “From the producer of Independence Day (my favorite and most watched movie)” and boom, I was in.

Part of the fun of a disaster movie is the schlocky plots and subpar acting.  You don’t expect a Meryl Streep performance in 2012.  You want John Cusack to take it somewhat seriously, but you don’t mind the nods and winks at the audience that the film is all in good fun.  What I’m trying to say,  is that I am literally the ideal audience for a movie like Geostorm.

… And I didn’t like it.  The biggest knock against Geostorm is that it tries to be more than a disaster movie.  There’s a whole political thriller somewhere in this film that is entirely unnecessary.  We don’t need a plot of who is trying to destroy the weather-controlling  satellites and that it could be the president and now the weather is falling apart.  All we need is weather-controlling satellites are potentially screwed up and Gerard Butler has to go to space to fix them.  In the meantime, the world gets destroyed by terrible unnatural disasters that we get to watch.

For a film that should be a disaster movie, Geostorm is light on cool visual effects.  There is one tsunami of ice set piece that is cool, but otherwise, it’s just brief views of natural disasters.

Geostorm is a massive disappointment for even those who just want a disaster movie.  I’m shocked I have to say this, but a movie like Geostorm needed …. less plot?  Wait to watch this one on FX for the next five years on a lazy Sunday.  Or not at all.

3 out of 10

31 Days of Horror: Open Water

“Where’s the boat?”

Susan

I watched Open Water on one of the demand cable channels.  Sometimes the premium movie channels only have the movie in standard definition, which looks absolutely awful on a modern TV in letterbox format (the horrors of first world problems), and I usually refuse to watch these.  As far as I know, the format of the Open Water movie I watched was the HD version.  If it truly was HD, it has to be one of the worst transfers in modern day history.

Open Water takes found footage and combines it with a shark attack. Released in 2003, Open Water made over 30 million dollars in the US on a $120,000 budget.  I may not have been a fan of this movie, but you can’t fail to be impressed by those sort of numbers.  It’s just another reason why studios love to make these low budget “found footage” movies if they can.

The film uses the “inspired by a true story” trope.  How true?  Well, apparently in 1998 a pair of Americans went out with a scuba group in an area off the coast of Australia.  They were accidentally abandoned and when their belongings were found two days later, the search began.  Neither of them were found, nor was there any sign they were attacked by sharks.  This all reads very much like the “inspired by a true story” of The Strangers, as in two people were murdered in a house and we’ll make up how it happened and say it was real!

Not much about Open Water clicks for me.  The task of filming this must have not been easy, but the characters are quite flat.  If you’re looking for someone to scream that there’s something near their legs for almost fifty minutes, Open Water is for you.

4 out of 10

31 Days of Horror: Lore (Ep 2) 2017

I reviewed the first episode of Lore earlier this month.  Most of the reviews I’ve seen for Amazon’s Lore have been positive, which makes me happy for Aaron Manhke.  For someone who started out as a writer, he has created a podcast and TV show that have millions of viewers.  It’s an impressive empire that many that create content wish they could replicate.

Episodes of the podcast version of Lore are typically a half hour long.  I tend to take a walk during lunch at work, and the podcast is the perfect amount of time for my time outside.  I’ve always found it easily digestible and a quirky story to listen to while I walk past some suburban homes.

There’s something different about watching episodes 2 and 3 of the television show (which are based on episodes of the podcast).  Lore tells us in its beginning credits that each story is based on true events.  Maybe it’s those words flashing across the screen, or the fact that there are reenactments of things that happened, but this makes the show all that more disturbing.

Episode 2 tells us the story of Dr. Walter Freeman and the ice pick lobotomy.  For those who aren’t familiar with the procedure, Freeman would drive an icepick through the patient’s eye, cutting away the frontal lobes from the rest of the brain with a side-to-side motion.  This was used on people who were considered “mentally ill” and could not be treated by modern medicine.

I don’t need to tell you, but the icepick lobotomy destroyed whatever lives these people had.  In a particularly chilling scene *SOMEWHAT SPOILER*, a woman is talking to Dr. Freeman about someone who won’t listen to what she has to say and that she’s run out of options.  Freeman tells her that the procedure will only take an hour, and that there is a coffeeshop across the street.  There’s a pause and then Freeman motions over the patient, a child who couldn’t be more than seven or eight.  END SPOILER This may have been discussed on the podcast, but to actually see a reenactment of the scene is horrific.  After a quick search, it seems that Freeman performed over 3000 of these procedures.

Manhke doesn’t necessarily make the man out to be a complete monster in the episode.  Freeman is a man driven to help people, or at least that’s how he justifies it to himself, and this is his solution to a broken US healthcare system of the 1950’s (sadly many problems still remain).

The story told over podcast format is disturbing enough, but to see a reenactment is another thing.  Lore proves once again that much of what humanity does is worse than what we imagine.

8 out of 10

31 Days of Horror: The Mist (2007)

He’s a fucking kid.  He’s supposed to be stupid.  What’s your excuse?

David Drayton

It’s hard to believe The Mist is ten years old.  I haven’t watched an episode of Spike’s new television reboot, but most reviews have been quite negative and the few scenes I have seen aren’t exactly pushing me to start.

The Mist (2007 and what I’ll be referring to from now on) is director Frank Darabont’s fourth adaptation of Stephen King’s work (Nightshift Collection, The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile).  The Shawshank Redemption has been the number one ranked  movie on IMDB for years, showing how much it has resonated with modern day audiences despite its moderate failure at the box office in 1994, and The Green Mile is widely considered another classic by most.

All of this meant Frank Darabont’s The Mist had high expectations.  While it never reaches the highs of The Shawshank Redemption or The Green Mile, I believe that the film is a stellar adaptation of a great King story.

Thomas Jane plays our main character and hero, David Drayton.  An artist who goes to the supermarket with his son and neighbor (Andre Braugher) after a storm that nearly destroys his house, Jane ends up trapped by a mysterious mist that is more than it seems to be.

The Mist is a movie that demands you talk about what happens, so I’m going to do some SPOILERS.  Mrs. Carmody (Marcia Gay Harden) is one of the most hateable and maddening characters I’ve ever seen on film.  She starts out as a crazy religious woman who spews nonsense about the mist being God’s wrath, but by the end of the movie, Carmody has a whole group of followers looking to help her sacrifice a child to stop the madness.  Would we all stoop to the lows this group does?  Some of us say we wouldn’t, but it’s an impossible thing to know unless you are put in the situation.  Harden’s performance is probably the best part of a film that has many great character actors (Toby Jones, William Sadler, Jeffrey DeMunn) doing work that elevates this film from just a B-movie to a classic.

The ending of The Mist is what everyone talks about the most.  King’s original story ends with the characters stuck in the car with sounds in the distance through the mist, but Darabont thought his new ending would pack more of a punch.  Reportedly, when shown the final cut of the film, King wished that he came up with the idea himself.  END SPOILERS

The Mist is a film that deals with human nature.  We all wonder what we might do when the chips are down, when rules are out the window and we feel our lives are at stake, and The Mist gives us a clear look into a dark vision of humanity.  Perhaps a little too clear.

8 out of 10

31 Days of Horror: World War Z

Most people don’t believe something can happen until it already has.  That’s not stupidity or weakness, that’s just human nature. 

Jurgen Warmbrunn

World War Z opened to a mixed reception in 2013.  A film with a troubled production, Damon Lindelof (Lost) and Drew Goddard (Cabin in the Woods) came in during the middle of production and wrote a whole different third act.  Fans of the source material, Max Brooks’ popular novel of the same name, and fans of the genre never seemed to really love the film, despite the fact it has a solid 63 Metascore from critics.  World War Z ended up making $200 million in the US on a $190 million budget (ballooned to this size because of reshoots).

If you’ve read Max Brooks’ World War Z, you don’t need me to tell you that this film is a terrible adaptation of the source material.  The novel uses the character of a reporter going around the world after a thwarted zombie apocalypse to get different people’s stories.  There’s the Battle of Yonkers, a pivotal battle where the US Army gets massacred by zombies, and a story of a boy with a samurai sword in Japan who survives his zombie-infested apartment complex, just to name a few favorites.  Some of these stories stand out more than the other, but if you ever get a chance, I recommend listening to the audio version.  It includes the talents of Simon Pegg and George Romero, whose films I both watched this month, in a star-studded production (it even has Scorsese!).  It’s been said before, but these stories would make a fantastic Netflix or Amazon TV series.

After all of what I just said, I still don’t find World War Z to be a bad movie.  If someone had told you that Brad Pitt would be headlining an almost $200 million dollar budget zombie movie in the year 2005, how crazy would you have thought they were?  While it may not be the best zombie movie, films like this help get other adaptations made.

World War Z has strong moments, most of them occurring in the first 2/3 of the film.  Gerry Lane (Brad Pitt) and his family making a narrow escape in a modern day Newark apartment building is terrifying.  I mean, just being in Newark is bad enough, but zombies in your building?  I guess that makes it worse (kidding but not really).

The movie goes off the rails in the final third of the film.  Reportedly the original storyline featured Pitt going to Russia and his wife (Mireille Enos) ending up in a somewhat forced relationship with parajumper (Matthew Fox).  I’m not sure if this would have worked, but it’s better than what we get in this version.  A visit to a medical facility and everyone surviving a plane crash?  It’s all a little too much.

World War Z has reportedly courted David Fincher for its sequel and the movie is moving towards a script.  The interview makes it seem like it’s far from a done deal, but the idea of Fincher directing a zombie movie is exciting.  I would love to see his take on the next film with Pitt as starring role.  The pair have always had success together and I don’t see why this would be any different.

World War Z isn’t the best zombie movie, it’s probably not even in the top 20 or so, but it’s worth seeing just to know what this type of film would look like with a big budget.

6.5 out of 10

 

31 Days of Horror: Night of the Living Dead (1968)

Well, there’s no problem. If you have a gun, shoot ’em in the head. That’s a sure way to kill ’em. If you don’t, get yourself a club or a torch. Beat ’em or burn ’em. They go up pretty easy.

Sheriff McClelland 

George Romero’s Night of the Living Dead gave us the modern zombie genre.  With The Walking Dead, zombies have become so prevalent in today’s culture that even your grandmother might know what they are.  I’ve seen Night of the Living Dead enough times and yet I still remember the first viewing.  I was in college, a new convert of horror movies, and wondered how could something from this long ago be scary?  Boy, was I wrong.

Since everyone who knows movies has seen or written about the original Night of the Living Dead, I wanted to put a different spin on my post.  Due to a lack of a copyright notice during the film’s release, Night of the Living Dead was put in the public domain.  This meant that anyone or any organization could show the movie without a dime going to Romero or the people who made the film.  A costly error no doubt, but something that has let countless people see the movie at no cost.

I decided to watch Lakeshore Records’ version of Night of the Living Dead, featuring original music by OGRE and Dallas Campbell, for my post.  It’s the same movie we’ve always loved, but with a new score that uses heavy synth and makes it sound like a John Carpenter 80’s movie.  You can actually buy the soundtrack here. (I don’t know these guys at all, I just think they did a really cool thing and wanted to support them)

If I had one complaint about the score at all, it would be that it’s a little loud at spots.  A score is something that I prefer in the background, I love to listen to them while I write, and I wish that it was a little quieter at times.  One of the best parts about Night of the Living Dead is the opening scene.  Johnny’s death at the beginning of the film sets the tone that this movie isn’t joking around right from the start, and the score compliments the action on screen perfectly (the tracks are “Cemetery” and “Graveside”).  The score also does a great job with Ben’s intro into the film, a cool synth track that syncs perfectly with him dispatching the zombies in and outside the house.

Night of The Living Dead was remade in the 1990’s.  Directed by renowned makeup artist and longtime Romero collaborator Tom Savini, the film is actually pretty good.  The strongest part of the remake is what the movie does with Barbara’s character.  Instead of the silent, nearly catatonic mess she is in the original film, Barbara is an important part of the team and badass in her own right.  If you haven’t seen the film, I really recommend you check it out.

Every movie fan should see Night of the Living Dead.  While I always recommend the original, it’s worth checking out the Lakeshore Records version if you want to hear something different.  It’s sometimes nice to hear and see a new take on something you love.

Night of the Living Dead Film Score: 10 out of 10

Lakehouse Record’s Score w/film: 8 out of 10